The Creation of Reality

The Creation of Reality: an attempt to think out how breathing effects emotion

As I sit and listen to my heart beat, I notice how easy it is to tune it out.

Also, I notice how easy it is to listen in.

I wonder, how does breathing work with this?

When I listen to my breathing, I hear my heart better. And I can slow it down.

But I really have to get behind this beating. I have to hold it, and hold it. And maybe it’s stronger than I think. It might be better to just hear it as if it was slower. I’ll listen for a slow beat behind the fast beat.

I hear, that instead of hearing 4 beats as 4 beats, I can hear them as parts of one larger beat. And to delineate the larger beat, I can use my breathing. I’ll breathe one time for every 4 beats. There, a pattern, and it sounds different.

It seems as though I can almost  ‘lassoo’ my heartbeats with a breath, and reign them in.

And, as my heart slows down just a bit, I suddenly take a big breath, and straighten out a bit.

I think about how my posture changes, and it feels different to sit.

And I’m reminded of how Maturana and Varela think of the organism as different layers of matter – from atoms to particles to cells to organs, etc. all the way up to biology and then to thinking processes.

And perhaps our posture is related as well. Simply another level of our body-organism.

And if our posture is related to our breathing, then it could also be related to our feeling of wellbeing in the world. The more in tune we are with our breathing and heartbeat, the more intact we are with the world. As we adjust our posture, we adjust our grasp on the world.

Of course, reality is still constantly shifting. There will always be new situations, different input, thoughts arise, emotions disturb, tensions tense. These input affect us on a basic physiological level, setting off the need to urgently recalibrate the system. Then – stop – see what’s going on with the heart and breathing, and calm again.

How do these aspects inform our bodily gestures?

In what way are our gestures related to our breathing? And on the other hand – in what way are our gestures related to our perceptions and beliefs of the world around us?

Afterall, we all understand the language of a “slump”, or how we “stand tall”. We “bow our heads” and “shoulder up”.
Is this category of expression not one of the basic elements of the written emotional grammar?

“We respond to gestures with an extreme alertness and, one might almost say, in accordance with an elaborate and secret code that is written nowhere, known by none, and understood by all.”

This above quote is from E. Sapir, the cultural scholar, from the Sapir-Whorf hypothesis. (The hypothesis being, in short, that language shapes our thought, so speakers of different languages will have different thought proceses).

While the Sapir-Whorf hypothesis has long been proven an elaborate overstatement, it’s still interesting to think about how language and thought might be related. (As a side-note: Psychology of Linguistics might learn a thing or two from Cultural Studies).

Which brings me back to Creation and Reality.

So which is it? Creation of Reality or Reality of Creation?

Turning of the Leaves

“Janus is the Roman god of gates and doors (ianua), beginnings and endings, and hence represented with a double-faced head, each looking in opposite directions. He was worshipped at the beginning of the harvest time, planting, marriage, birth, and other types of beginnings…” – Encyclopedia Mythica

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Autumn has always been a particularly significant time for me. That my birthday coincides with the always anticipated beginning of the new school year made it a kind of personal new year for me. The reflective nature of the Jewish high holidays, from Rosh haShanah (New Year) until Yom Kippur (Day of Attonement) intensifies this feeling of the ‘turning of the leaves’.

So, this seems an appropriate time to finally set up my blog, and pay tribute to the natural tides that inspired the myth of Janus. Trying to find a descriptive recap of the last year, I’d say that overall it whet my appetite, and I’m way hungry for more…

Academics – STS @ BIU:
This was the big one – after my first year of study, I can say that BIU’s STS program (Science, Technology and Society) is turning out to be everything I had hoped.

I’ve seen how people make the place, and the fact that this program has drawn so many inquisitive, intelligent, creative and warm people is a tribute to the head of the program – Dr. Noah Efron, and his engaging and thoughtful approach to research, academia, and what creating a stimulating learning environment can be.

Secondly, I’ve been able to reconnect with my love for philosophy and theory, and while it feels as though I’ve climbed up a hill in only in order to better see the enormous mountain range, I’ve also found a few really interesting leads into those mountains.

Conferences – Speech speech!
2007 brought with it some more academic speech opportunities, and I thoroughly enjoyed them! It really is a great opportunity to share fruits of work already complete, as well as to formulate and communicate heretofore incoherent thoughts.

Art it is – The Upgrade TA
This summer brought a number of treats, one of which was opportunity knocking a second time in the form of The Upgrade TA.

This deserves its own post, but suffice it to say for now that it has reminded me how much I enjoy the people involved with Upgrade – and in particular, Ariel Malka. And in general it’s a good excuse to get nosey about what’s happening in the new media/interactive art scene (since I’ve been distracted with other things). Not that you really need an excuse, but I enjoy having a platform to channel the ideas that spring up after meeting all of the intriguing and talented people out there.

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So, I’m using this reflective time to gather myself up for the challenges in the upcoming year. One of which is a lot more writing – academic, popular and creative. Focusing the subject of my dissertation will be one of the more critical tasks – I expect I’ll be spitting blood on that one quite a bit on this blog. Be forewarned :) Keeping Upgrade moving and developing, realizing some of the ideas that Ariel and I have been brainstorming.

And there’s a lot more brewing and stewing. I’m excited, a little scared, but mostly feeling a strong and welcome directive energy to become very focused with my time and activities.

Time is a truly double-faced character.
It occurred to me that Rosh haShanah is first, and faces forward towards the new year. And then comes Yom Kippur, facing backwards.
First, we are reminded that all things, up to the angels in the heavens, are recreated anew, each day and each year. And then pushed to cut the emotional cords that tie us to the inner demons of fear, doubt and confusion from the past. We’ve already been given a new slate, now it’s our turn to pick up the pen, take a deep breath, and give bright new form to our thoughts dreams and desires.

Wishing all clear sight and focused strength,
for a happy, sweet and successful year of personal and collective growth and betterment.